Please Be Mindful of What You Say To My Kids

I get a lot of questions and comments as a twin mom. I'm used to it and usually it doesn't bother me. But lately we're getting this one question that I had been humoring but is really starting to get to me:

"Which one is the troublemaker (or boldie, handful, evil twin, easy one, enter some other insulting but "cute" descriptive term)?"

or

"Double Trouble! You've got your hands full, Mom!"

Just last week at the grocery store a woman looked at my girls for all of 3 seconds and stated very matter-of-factly, "Oooh, I can tell you're the troublemaker," to Jules. I asked her why she thought that and she said, "She's got that smile, the other one just looks more cautious."

She was right, Jules was smiling and Viv was furrowing her brow at her like she tends to do. It seemed innocent but this exchange really made me stop and think about what happens when people make assumptions about kids, often based solely on the looks on their faces.

At the very least I wonder since when did a smile equate troublemaking behavior? Just because she's a little more outgoing? Isn't that a desirable trait? But I'm really trying to figure out why it's ok to say that to her face? Even if that smile does mean she's a little more brazen, does it warrant being called a troublemaker? That's not the association I want my daughter having with smiling, would you?

Are we not at the point yet where we realize our words have meaning, even for the youngest of people? People still don't understand that what we say impacts how they feel, about themselves and the world around them? And, more importantly, would she have said anything at all if her sister wasn't sitting behind her, not smiling?

I've noticed that we don't tend to do this with typical siblings - make guesses about what type of people they are, at least not in comparison to their sister. But it seems like as soon as you mention the word twins everything becomes black or white. We try to find their differences and define them, to figure out who they really are. Just because they were born at the same time.

Just being a twin does not mean one is inherently good or bad. Yes, they came from one egg that split but not in such a literal sense that they each inherited only one kind of particular personality traits. That's just crazy. And yet, when you ask my toddlers "Which one likes to give Mommy the hard time?" you are insinuating that one of them was born to be bad.

We need to remember, not just for twins but for all children: who they are at any given moment does not define them and certainly doesn't give us any logical reason to label one as "trouble" or as "the good one".

The last thing I need is one of my kids thinking she has an excuse to be a rebel just because she was born that way - while her sister got all the "good" parts.

Trust me, neither one gives me an easy time all the time. I'm fairly certain that's normal, yes?

Also, for the love of all things, please do not call them double trouble. Yes, there are two of them. Yes, kids can be hard at times - ALL kids are hard. But they are not double trouble. I can't figure out why people say it - so many do - but I think they just think it's cute. It's not. At least not to me.

Would you ever stroll past a family with just one child and randomly proclaim, "She looks like trouble!"? No, right? So, why is it different for my kids? Oh right, because they happened to be born together.

Exhibit A

Exhibit B: Each exercising their right to be 1 year old. Not double trouble. Just 1 year old sisters.

I remember people categorizing me as a child and it drove me nuts. Even though a lot of the time people were making accurate assessments it stung to hear that the adults I cared about thought I was a worry-wort, dramatic, a smart-ass or a know-it-all. I didn't choose to be these things, it was partly my temperament and partly just me trying to figure out how the world worked.

Instead of bucking those descriptions I chose to embrace them - it's what everyone thought I was anyway, so why not? I made it a point to be as obnoxious and theatrical as I could, to garner attention with my outbursts and seemingly uncontrollable emotions. By the time I was 18 I had made up my own mental illness and was on my way to getting myself committed when I realized I didn't want to play this game anymore. I made a choice to break the trend and change the way people thought of me. I reinvented myself in college, lost a lot of my old friends as a result and ultimately became a happier and healthier person. But I really wish I didn't have to go through all that to get there.

Would it have been different if I never tried to fit in the boxes people put me in?

At 15 months old I have no idea who my children are and even if I did I certainly wouldn't want to slap a label on for them to carry through their lives.

Yes, it can be fun to draw comparisons and psychoanalyze them, especially because they are identical twins (trust me my inner psych major is always itching to experiment with them). But the fact is that aside from our most basic personality traits, those that make up our temperament (think: would you rather be alone or in a crowd, do you prefer reading or running, are you anxious or easy-going?) we are meant to be fluid - changing and adapting as we grow. At the very least none of us are still the same type of person we were at 15 months old.

We need to realize that what we say matters. What seems innocent can cause harm. Those labels can and do stick and they can hinder growth, especially when there is a negative connotation attached. Like the word trouble. That's not something I want for my girls. My fear is that at some point they will internalize the idea that one is good and one is bad, or worse that they are both bad just because there's two of them. And who knows what will happen next.

So, please, when you see a set of twins out and about, don't ask which one is the troublemaker. Don't ask which one is the favorite. Don't assume to know anything about who they are based on the few seconds you've watched them or the looks on their faces. You wouldn't compare and label a set of adult siblings you just met so why treat my toddlers any differently?  Imagine how you'd feel if someone labeled you as "the bad one" just because you were having a moment. Or if you were the "good one" because your sister was scowling. It's not fair and it's not ok.

Instead, say something like, "Are you having fun shopping with your Mom?" "I like your pink shirt." or "I see you have a sister, I bet you have a lot of fun together!"

Again, I know it's hard - they're identical twins and that changes the way people think of them. I can't change that (but I'm going to try). Regardless of what you see in those few minutes you talk with us, it means nothing in the grand scheme of things. Your words, on the other hand, do mean something, so please choose them wisely.

Xo,
Maigen

How We Do Bath Time With Twins (without a bath tub!)

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links.

We all know now that my own personal hygiene took a back seat to the babies but I had no idea how much I would come to hate THEIR bath time. It was once the bane of my existence.

They love baths so me hating it broke my heart. We were so blessed to have two babies who absolutely love water and never so much as whined in the bath, from day one.

But over time it became a nightmare. All because of one thing. Actually, the lack of one thing.

An actual tub.

How the heck do you bathe two babies when you don't have a freaking bath tub?

A little back story: Three years ago we lived in a vast and spacious three bedroom apartment with a huge kitchen, double sink and all. The bathroom was small but had a massive 80 year old claw foot tub. We should have loved it but we didn't. The apartment was nice, but it was old, dusty and drafty. The one thing we really hated was that damned tub. I know, le gasp! Claw foot tubs are awesome and everyone wants one, right? We couldn't stand it. The shower curtains didn't fit right no matter what we did, water sprayed everywhere and it created a wind vortex that made the curtain swallow you. Just picture being touched by a shower curtain constantly while trying to get clean. Ick. After six months we were done and when we found our current "cozy" two bedroom with a big backyard and no bathtub we were over the moon.

Just about a year later we got pregnant with twins. Oops. Looking back I realize our last place would have been perfect for our new family of four - including that massive bath tub that I hated so much. Alas, here we are and here we will stay until we buy a house so we've had to be a little innovative when it comes to cleaning the babies.

When they were small we used a great baby tub and bathed them one at a time. The Fisher Price 4-in-1 Sling 'n Seat Tub fit great in our large kitchen sink. The newborn sling worked well for the first couple months. I would put one baby in a bouncy seat on the floor next to me and bathe the other. We dried off and dressed right on the kitchen table then switched them. The whole process took about an hour and by month four I was itching to bathe them together.

Teeny Tiny Jules!

As they got bigger and moved on from the sling I wasn't as happy with the tub. They kept slipping down and rolling over and baths became downright scary. We only bathed them once a week because it was so stressful trying to get it done.


 But then the best thing happened - they started sitting up on their own. After making sure they had it down well enough to avoid head injuries I ditched the baby tub and went old school with the kitchen sink. My sweet grandmother gave us this old Flipper toy to cover the faucet and we laid a towel down on the bottom to keep them comfortable. This worked for a glorious 3 months until they started pulling up and standing. All of a sudden the sink was too short and we were risking them falling out with each bath. Back to square one.

Happy and Easy Bath!

I asked for tips in a group of twin moms and one Mom suggested using a deep and wide storage tote in the shower. A make-shift bath tub! Brilliant! I happened to have a large one just sitting in my room waiting to be filled with stuff. That night I threw it in the shower, filled it with water and popped them in after dinner.

It was awful.

For the first time ever they screamed and cried and tried to escape the whole bath time. Every time they tried to stand up they would slip and fall under the water which led to more hysterics. I won't even talk about what happened when I turned the shower on to rinse them. I pretty much resolved that we would just not bathe them ever again until we moved. If that meant we never left the house then so be it. I would not torture my babies because society thinks they need to be clean. Until we figured something else out it was baths in the baby pool out back!

How we took baths all summer!

Until the epically sticky poo-splosion of August 2015 (sorry for that visual). I had no choice. And yet I knew I couldn't put them through that again.

So I tried one more thing. Instead of putting the tote in the dark and echo-filled shower, I put it in the middle of the bathroom and turned the heat on - yes, in August. Oh the things we do for our babies. I also ran the shower for a bit to warm up the room quickly. I had picked up a bath mat for the bottom of the tote to fix the slipperiness. I filled the tote with warm water and added their favorite toys and talked them through the whole thing while we got ready. I braced myself for the screams and slowly put them in.

It was wonderful.

They laughed and splashed and played and we had our first non-nerve-wracking bath in months.

Success. No tears, no screams, happiness!

Until I tried to wash them.  Up until then I had just used my hands and soap. But that was not an option with this glue-like poo (thank you solid foods). So I soaped up one of our washcloths and tried to wipe them off. I should have known better from the way they act like you're murdering them when you try to clean their faces after a meal but I didn't realize they would hate it so much. Ugh. I tried to talk them through it but in the end just pushed through what ended up being another miserable bath. As if that wasn't bad enough I watched in horror as Jules' skin flared up right before my eyes after washing it. It had taken us months to find a soap that didn't anger her skin and now I realized that even the gentlest soap would still hurt with the harshness of washcloths. I tried multiple cloths and every one was just too rough for her sensitive skin.

I was at my wit's end.

Then I got the chance to review these incredible bamboo washcloths from The Motherhood Collection. You guys, they're like butter. They are the softest, most luxurious washcloths I've ever felt. If you buy any washcloths for your baby, make sure it's these. Not only are they perfect for Jules' skin but cleaning is a breeze - they don't even act like they feel it! Instead of pulling away and crying they just let me do it, even with their faces after meals. I wish I had found them months ago!

My mother is paranoid and only let them have like 3 inches of water. They didn't care!

I got a glimpse of how easy bath time could be when we gave them one at my mom's. It almost made me cry with how easy and stress-free it was, how happy they were to have space to crawl around and play. If we could do that every other night we would but for now, at 15 months in, I have finally found the winning combination for the perfect bath time without a tub:

1. A storage tote from Wal-Mart placed in the middle of the warm bathroom. Use a removable shower head to fill it. We place towels under and around the tote to soak up water and to help move it over to the shower to empty it.
2. A soft suction cup bath mat from Wal-Mart. I just bought a standard size one and it fits pretty well with the sides folded against the side of the tote.
3. The cleanest, most hypo-allergenic soap we can find. For us it's Exederm.
4. These amazing bamboo cloths from The Motherhood Collection

I hope no one else has to go through all this drama just for clean kids, but if there's anyone out there struggling like us may you find some relief in what worked for us!

Xo,
Maigen

What We Learned On Our First Family Road Trip (with 1 Year Old Twins)!

We had two extended family gatherings this week! Papa T's Birthday and 4th of July at Grandma's which is 2.5 hours away. While neither of these were as hard as our extended trip will be in 2 weeks, it was great practice for me!

In just these two experiences I have learned so much about accommodating 1 year old twins when they are out of routine and on extended car rides. I also realized how it differs from when they were newborns like last summer. In case you were wondering - it's harder. I miss when I could just set them somewhere and not worry about them taking off or when they would actually want to go to "strangers"(ie: family they just haven't seen yet this week), so I could eat or get a drink or pee.

Happy Birthday Papa T!

Here's what I learned:

 

Plan to leave the house 1.5 hours before you actually need to leave. Don't forget add in time to stop and feed them if you need to - especially if you still feed on demand!

I thought I had timed it perfectly so they would eat when we got there. We planned to leave at 930 but didn't absolutely have to leave until 11. We left at 1035. It was perfect until they woke up early and got hungry when we were 15 minutes from Grandma's. Obviously you should not nurse in a moving car so we were glad we gave ourselves a little extra time.

 

Bring Portable Chairs for Them to Eat In

Most people don't just have extra have high chairs in their homes. It seems like no big deal, the kids can just eat on your lap, right? Wrong. First, have you ever tried to get two wild toddlers to sit on your lap at a table and eat? Maybe while you're trying to eat too? It's actually impossible. So lay a blanket on the floor or grass, you say. Nope, yet again. I've tried this several times since we started eating solids and the ratio of food offered to food eaten is like 100 to 5.  Especially when there are so many cool new things to see and people to talk to. The last thing these kids want to do is sit and eat their BBQ chicken or corn on the cob. Until we strap them in their chairs and they have no choice. We registered for and are in love with these Boppy Chairs (affiliate link). They fold up and travel well, are super easy to keep clean and have plenty of room to grow.

When you bring their portable high chairs make sure you bring the trays too.

Especially when you know you'll be eating outside (hello, it's a BBQ). This lovely lunch I packed for them ended up all over the blanket and living room floor because we grabbed the chairs but not the trays. Impromptu picnics are awesome, sometimes. This time it was a huge mess but worse they were starving on the way home because most of their food got sat on or thrown away. We will never forget those damn trays again!

You will forget something. Don't try to avoid it. 

I made lists. I counted everything and double checked. It was our first road trip, I was determined. We were good! See above.

Bring novel, open-ended toys that will keep their attention for when you want to eat. 

I actually did this one right finally and I'm glad I put some thought into it. They ate as soon as we got there so they weren't hungry by the time my food was ready. I put letters and tops in the puffs containers for them to find after they shook and rolled them. Once they got them open and dumped I gave them buckets to fill and empty. I put parchment paper and blocks in a wipes box but they didn't even get to those. They were occupied and happy for a while and I was able to eat quickly before they started crawling up me again.

Ask people if they want to hold your kids and don't forget to take pictures.

Once they relaxed a bit I was able to pass them off to some very eager relatives.  I got a lot of great pictures with their GG and cousins who we don't see very often. If they are happy, I take some pics then sneak away for some grown up conversation. I learned to take advantage of these crazy family parties where everyone just wants to love on the babies to capture memories and also have a little more fun myself! Bonus because it seems to be helping them get used to other people when they spend every single moment of their lives with mom.

If your kids are creatures of habit plan on being home before bedtime, staying the night or learning how to help them cope with a late(r) night. 

This was a rookie mistake I made at both family events this week. Nights are crazy if they don't sleep well during the day or miss their bedtime. We knew this and planned accordingly but things happen and again, we did not count on having to stop and feed them on the way home. Aside from trying to make sure we're home by 7:30 all summer I'm learning ways to handle it because I don't want them to be up all night when we can't control being home late.

Definitely try to not get home the exact moment when there's a billion fireworks going off on your street. 

Happy 4th everyone! I love fireworks. It was awesome to see them on the way home. It was less awesome to come home to every person on our block outside putting on their own personal show. Just getting into the house was like walking through a war zone with two overtired and hungry babies. Vivienne was absolutely losing her mind and CJ went into a rage over it and almost killed the neighbors (instead he cleaned the house while I got the girls "settled" - he is awesome). It was a rough hour or so but they're finally sleeping!

All in all it was a great week full of laughs and new memories. I'm so glad my girls are old enough to really enjoy their first real summer! And I'm super happy for the road trip trial run before our trip next weekend to the Pocono's! Here's hoping it all goes smoothly! I hope you all had a great 4th of July!

Xo,
Maigen

How to Find The Perfect Baby Name(s)!

I have had a love for baby names ever since I was practically a baby myself. I suppose it all started with how much I disliked my own name growing up. I know Maigen (btw, it's said may-gen, not Megan or Meegan or Mygen) is a beautiful name but I quickly realized it was hard for people to pronounce correctly, no one knew how to spell it and it drew unwanted attention to me as a shy child. I dreamed of having a simple name like Annie, Emily or Katie, like my sister.

I finally embraced my name in college and started following baby name blogs to build a nice cache of choices long before I even dreamed of having kids of my own. I have a great ability to predict what will eventually become popular names.  I fell in love with Emma, Olivia, Sophia, Ava and Ella long before they were common (there's a reason for that though, read more about the 100 year rule). I obviously like classic, pretty, flowy names and after watching every name I loved reach higher popularity I knew I was going to have to dig deeper when it came to naming my own.

We knew we didn't want anything too common but not too out there either. There's nothing wrong with a popular name but  having grown up with a "made-up" name I can tell you that's no picnic either. There is something to be said for originality though and for not having your child be one of four girls with the same name in her class. In 9th grade I had a Jessica F., Jessica B., Jessica C., Jessica I., Jessica N., and Jessica S. and they were just the ones I had classes with. We also had numerous Carrie/Kari/Kerries, Amandas, Katies and, of course, Jennifers. They envied me and I envied them. I knew I needed to avoid this so that meant some of my favorites (Ella, Ava, Madelyn and Olivia) were off our list before we even started.

Nowadays it's easier to give your baby a unique name that's not popular and you don't have to go all the way to the other end of the spectrum and make up a name or modify an existing one to do so. That said, the hard part is finding a name that both you and Dad like, that you can see your child grow into and that is easy enough for the rest of the world to pronounce and spell. We had the added fun of trying to come up with two names that fit the bill. So how exactly do you do it?

Baby Name Books

The old school way that is quickly going the way of other paper products what with so many resources on the interwebs. While looking I did refer to a few that I've had for years (again, I was obsessed long before I even met CJ). My favorites were Cool Names by Pamela Redmond Satran and Linda Rosenkrantz which is chock full of great ideas and 20,001 Names for Baby which gives pretty detailed information on name meanings and usage. I also bought a copy of The Baby Name Wizard by Laura Wattenberg when we got desperate. This is a great combo of the above books with great ideas including name "snapshots", sibling suggestions, tips and tricks for choosing a name and a pronunciation guide. She also included a a look at baby name trends and a great breakdown of names by any type or style you could imagine such as Bell Tones, New Classics, Nickname-Proof and Short and Sweet.

Baby Name Websites

Modern baby naming is almost more difficult with the number of naming sites cropping up everywhere. It's almost like when you go to a diner and sit down to order from a menu that is 12 pages long. There is so much to choose from that it's hard to narrow down a few choices let alone pick just one. That said the ability to find just about any name ever used is pretty awesome.

Baby Name Wizard - This site, run by Laura Wattenberg, the Baby Name Lady herself, is full of great ideas and tools including the Name Mapper (currently under construction) which tells you where names are the most popular, the Name Voyager which explores baby name trends through time and the NamiPedia which gives a more detailed look at a name as well as personal anecdotes from people who have or who used the name.

Nymbler - Another amazing resource from Laura Wattenberg, Nymbler allows you to input your choices and then generates similar names based on sound, style and spelling. It's where we found the Juliette to our Vivienne!

Nameberry - This UK based website is full of information. They break names down into really fun lists like Angel names, Geek-Chic names, Nature names and Video Game names. The forums are very busy and a great resource for more ideas. Although many of the names they cover have yet to cross the sea into popular usage over here if you're wanting to be really unique you will likely find your dream name here!

Apellation Mountain  - Abby believes that every name has a story and she's here to help you learn all about them. Her Name of the Day series spotlights newer gems and classics and covers the history, etymology and cultural usage of a name. I love reading her descriptions of names and can spend hours just scrolling through her site.

What A Lovely Name  - A lovely little interactive site where you can choose which qualities you would like in a name and they generate a list for you! I didn't discover this one until writing this blog but I wish I had found it while still pregnant!

Social Security Administration - Weird right? Who would think the government would be a good place to find a baby name. This is one of the best though as it can tell you a lot about the popularity of a name over time. Every year they list the most popular names in the country for that year but it also goes all the way back to 1879 so you can definitely use it for some ideas. Once you've chosen a name you can also go and find out it's ranking throughout history.

I came across our short list the other day and was surprised to see some names that I'd forgotten all about. CJ really liked Penny (think James Bond) and Hazel and I was in love with Eleanor and Lila. We settled on boys names pretty early on and were going to use Miles Thomas and Eli Charles. Vivienne was picked after my cousin mentioned it was one of her favorites. It was kind of like that scene on Friends where Rachel steals Monica's baby name (Emma!). As soon as she said it something just clicked and I knew that was one of my girls' names. I felt awful for taking it but she swears she doesn't mind.

Juliette came and went and came and went on our list. We liked it after Nymbler suggested it but weren't sure how much we did until one of our last ultrasounds when the tech pointed out that we could do J for baby A and V for baby B. I loved that and the fact that they go together without being too matchy. Of course now they go by Jules and Viv (or Hooles and Lion) most of the time! I do take pride in the fact that I chose a beautiful "sib-set" and that my name choices are admired in the baby name community!

How did you pick your baby names?

Xo,
Maigen

Dear New Mom of Twins...

Hi there,

How are you doing? No, no, you heard me right, I'm not asking how are are the babies, I want to know, how are you? Are you loving every minute? Barely hanging in there? Ready to break? Gone to crazy town and never coming back?

I've been there. I've felt all of it. And I'm here to tell you that you are amazing.

No matter what kind of twins you have, no matter how you created them, no matter how they arrived, no matter how you are feeding them, no matter where they are sleeping, no matter what - you are amazing. Even though you might very well feel like utter garbage right now, You. Are. Amazing.

You, new mom of two, are in the trenches right now. It's likely you're not sleeping much, your body, heart and soul are undergoing massive changes and you feel completely incompetent at times. You may be wondering what on earth you've gotten yourself into and how anyone could ever think that YOU could care for two babies at once. It's to be expected. Not only that but it's normal. It's normal to feel like you have no idea what you're doing, to question everything, to worry constantly and to feel as though you're going to royally muck this up. You won't though. Know why?  Because no matter how you do it, as long as you're there, you're doing great. Fantastic even. Again, you are amazing.

Maybe it hasn't happened yet but at some point in the next few weeks you will look over at your brand new babies and feel something you've never felt before. It's a grand mixture of pride, fear and overwhelming love. A love you have never felt before, that you can't describe, that you didn't even know you were missing until this moment. And this feeling is what will keep you going for the next six weeks, six months, six years, forever. This feeling is what it means to be a mother and you get to feel it times two. We are a lucky breed us twin moms. Two times the diapers, cries and mess also means we get two times the hugs, laughs and love. And I promise you there will be plenty of all of them.

I know right now you feel like you have no idea who you are anymore. There's a reason for that. The "you" that you once were is no more. You are forever changed.  But, no matter how much it seems like it, you are not gone, you have just evolved. In the next weeks and months you will discover abilities you never knew you had. You will feel confused and anxious as you try to keep up but you will adapt. You will question everything you ever knew and wonder if you will survive this. I promise you, you will.

It will get easier. And then it will get harder. And then easier again. Your life will be a roller coaster from here on out. Your heart, patience and strength will be tested in ways you didn't think possible. But you will survive and you will come out the other side stronger, smarter and more confident. You, my friend, are doing something incredible. Friends will ask you how you do it. Strangers will tell you, "Better you than me!" and they're right. You were chosen for this because of who you were before these babies ever even existed. You were meant to do this. To give these two tiny humans a life full of love, laughs and lessons and no other person in the world could do it better than you.

I know right now it feels like you are nothing more than a poop wiper, a sounding board for cries, a milk cow and a sleep deprived robot running on auto-pilot in a land you've never seen before let alone know how to navigate. It's freaking hard and that's an understatement. You have no idea what it takes to keep two babies alive and happy until you're forced to do it. But you will do it. And one day soon those babies will wake up and instead of wailing and clawing at your breast they will smile at you and you will understand. The light bulb will click and your heart will sing and you will think, "Oh, that's why." You will, I promise you, get through this.

You will cry. You will want to run. You will scream and beg for your old life back. You may even close a door and pull out your hair and say, "I'm done! I can't do this anymore!" And it's ok. It's ok to walk away. It's ok to ask for help - in fact, it's mandatory. You must ask for help. Do not attempt to be super woman just because you think you should. Just as your little babies are growing so too are you. As you bolster their bodies and brains, you learn and grow right along with them. You are not meant to know how to do it all yet, so seek out help the second you feel like you need it. Call your mom over or text your best friend when you feel like just can't anymore. Get on facebook and vent your frustrations to other moms who have been there. Rather than look inept you will look smart because not one person expects you to do this alone. They say it takes a village to raise a child. I'd say that means it takes a whole country to raise twins.

I want you to do something. Right now, no matter what is going, no matter how messy your house is, or what needs to be done, no matter how upset your babies are, how miserable YOU are, I want you to go into your room or the bathroom and look at yourself in the mirror. I don't care if you haven't showered in a week or you feel like crap, go. Look. See what I see? You are still there. Yes, you look different - maybe you still look pregnant or there are dark circles under your eyes or your hair is three different shades of greasy. It is still you though. Smile. Say hello to yourself. Listen to your voice. Pinch your skin. You are real, you are alive and you can do this. You WILL do this and you will rock it. Because this is your life now and everything you have ever done has prepared you for it.

It seems like a million years away right now but one day you will wake up and feel rested again. One night you will put the babies down and they will stay down for a blissful 12 hours. One afternoon you will realize that it's the first time since you can remember that you don't have spit-up in your hair, poop on your pants or food on your shirt. You will have time to take a proper shower and you will wonder what on earth to do with all of those 20 minutes. You will sit down to drink a cup of coffee and actually finish it before a baby cries. And you will wonder how on earth it went so fast. I know, right now you think I'm crazy, but I promise you, you will one day yearn for the days when you could lay with both your babies on your chest and still breathe, even if it means going back to the up all nights and marathon feedings. You will miss that feeling and you will wish you hadn't rushed them to grow up. Maybe you will balk at it and I'm sure you've heard it before, but you need to understand it. Someday, you are going to miss this.

So now, if you're feeling up for it, I want you to go to your babies. Pick them up and smell them, touch them, kiss them and commit everything to your memory. Whether they're a few days, weeks or months old, look into their faces and make your brain memorize exactly how this feels, the weight of them in your arms, the touch of their skin on yours, the smell of their heads, the color of their eyes. Tell your brain that this is a moment you want to look back on years from now. Even if today is the worst day since they were born - set aside the frustration and memorize this moment. Breathe in the good and make yourself remember it. Years from now when they are starting school or driving you crazy as teenagers or on their wedding day you will reach way back into the catacombs of your brain and you will find this precious moment when all they wanted in this great big world was you and you alone. And you will feel a sense of accomplishment like no one else can.

Because you are amazing. Every day, from the second they were created, you have been amazing. You have done something most women have not even dreamed of. You owe it to yourself to know that you will be ok, it will all be ok, no matter how bad it is right now. I promise, you, you amazing woman, will be just fine. Because, remember and repeat this, you. are. amazing.

Xo,
Maigen

My Best Tips for a Happy and Healthy {Twin} Pregnancy

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links.

The hardest parts about being pregnant with twins (aside from the initial shock and figuring out how you'll afford it) are making sure that you eat and drink enough, stay active and get enough rest. Some days, even in the beginning, the exhaustion and pain were so bad that I could barely sweep the floor after lunch at the daycare without needing to sit down. I was constantly starving and thirsty which led to feeling nauseous even though I didn't really have morning sickness. Growing two babies almost literally took everything I had and it was a full time job just keeping myself as healthy possible and staying sane at the same time.

So, how exactly do you take the best care of yourself and your babies? Read on to find out.

Eat. Eat Everything (good for you) and All The Time:

Everyone knows that pregnant women eat a lot but when you're carrying two it's insane how much and how often you need to eat. My body was giving everything to my babies and no matter how much I ate I still struggled to gain enough weight, at least according to Dr. Luke and the book When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets or Quads. While I love this book there were times where I felt like no matter how much I did I could not keep up with how much I should have been eating. The overwhelming message of this book though is truth - Eat. Eat. Eat! As long as you're eating healthily (read: do not live on soda, chips or other crap, you will feel like crap) majority of the time you cannot eat too much. Do not give one second of thought to the people or even doctors who warn you about gaining too much weight. As Dr. Luke points out - you cannot gain too much with twins - every pound is building stronger, healthier babies!

I needed to eat every two hours or nausea would set in. Once that happened I could only stomach crackers until it passed. I couldn't just eat anything either, I craved protein, dairy and carbs like crazy.

Here's What I Ate:

Every morning I would have oatmeal or eggs, sausage or bacon, a bagel or toast and a banana plus one of my protein packed smoothies (find the recipe here).

Two hours later I would have a "snack" that usually consisted of trail mix, a cheese stick, peppers or carrots and an apple or grapes.

Lunch would be a tuna, egg, pb&j or grilled cheese sandwich or a chicken and veggie quesadilla or burrito with a huge salad, a protein shake and berries or a banana.

Two hours later another snack of a granola bar, yogurt, cheese and crackers or whatever the kids at daycare were having.

Dinner was grown man portions of chicken, fish, pasta or whatever we were having with lots of steamed veggies and always a few pieces of bread and butter.

Two hours later another snack although it was more of a dessert with either ice cream or fruit and yogurt or a bowl of cereal.

You're probably thinking how the hell did she eat that much. I did, and then some. And, despite eating all this I still found myself snacking again around 11pm and waking up starving at 7am. I kept crackers in my nightstand my entire pregnancy for the middle of the night and early morning hunger so the nausea wouldn't hit before I got a chance to eat something real.

When I developed gestational diabetes it was harder to eat as much while watching my carb intake but I just swapped out the cereal, juice, some of the fruit and bread for more yogurt, cheese, veggies and protein. I started eating beans which I had always hated. I limited myself to just one slice of pizza and left the crust but followed it with a salad. My numbers stayed low but I still felt full and satisfied. Contrary to what a lot of women (including myself) think at first, GD is not the end of the world.

The bottom line is to eat, eat, eat. Even when you don't feel like you could or should eat anymore - eat. You are feeding three people and your body is taking everything good from you to give to your babies so give it what it needs!

Drink. Like Water is Going Out of Style:

Years before I was pregnant a friend of mine was hospitalized while pregnant for dehydration. She got really sick and needed to be monitored constantly afterwards. This terrified me as every time I had seen her she had her water bottle with her. I worried so much about remembering to drink enough water but when it came down to it I didn't really have to force it. I was so thirsty all the time and felt like I could never quench it. I drank over 200 oz. of water a day. So much that my LifeFactory Glass Water Bottle became my little side kick and the kids at the daycare would drop everything and rush it over to me if I forgot it somewhere.

I would wake up in the middle of the night to pee and feel so parched I'd down a full 8 oz. knowing full well I would be needing to pee again in an hour. It didn't matter though, I knew that this was one of the most important things I could do . They're not kidding when they say water is one of the most important parts of a healthy pregnancy. According to What To Expect drinking enough water helps your body absorb all the vital nutrients, bulks up the amniotic fluid and keeps the pipes running clean, which is ever so important when you digestive tract slows down and things start to get uncomfortable. Even many of those dreaded pregnancy symptoms - headaches, nausea, overheating and fatigue can be helped by drinking enough water. You don't have to give up your morning coffee and you can have a juice or a soda a day if you really need it but it is absolutely vital that you drink water all day, every day. I swear my constant consumption of H2O is one of the reasons my pregnancy wasn't an absolute nightmare. So drink, drink, drink your weight in water! And when you feel like you can't possibly drink anymore, drink some more. Your baby and your body will thank you, even though your bladder might not!

Move. Stay Active as Often and as Long as You Can:

Ok, this one was tough for me. I am not huge into fitness as it is so when I found out that I should be "working out" at least 3 times a week while pregnant I felt a little anxious. Some days I was too tired to move, how was I supposed to get up and work out? Well, the sad truth is I never really did. But, I did stay as active as I could. I worked in daycare so I was up and down and moving all around right up until I left my job at 6 months. Unless you've done it you can't possibly know how physically demanding it can be caring for 12 munchkins. I was more than active enough to feel like I didn't really need to do scheduled work outs. Same goes if you've got older kids at home!

When I left work I made it a point to do stretches, yoga and walking every day, even if just for 10 minutes. It was a struggle towards the end but I really did feel better when I was moving around. Also, even just a five minute walk around the block helped manage the diabetes and keep my numbers low. I was honest with my Doctors and they understood my limitations but encouraged me to do as much as I could. I downloaded prenatal yoga sessions and would use those to unwind after a long day. I stretched every morning before work which helped with back and muscle aches. When it all became too much I considered walking from the couch to the fridge a work out because carrying around the added 35 lbs. certainly made it feel like one! Do what you can,but don't feel too bad if it's not much!

Rest. Again, as Often and as Much as You Can:

It's a sad truth that enough sleep is tough to attain while pregnant despite the fact that you face many months of sleep deprivation after baby arrives. Even very early on hormonal changes make your body go crazy causing some lovely sleep disruptions like nausea, heartburn, back aches and needing to pee every hour. Add to this the strain of a growing belly in the later months and it can be almost impossible to fall and stay asleep. I invested very early on in a pregnancy pillow that I still consider to be a lifesaver. Sure, you could just use a regular pillow or a body pillow but I swear by the Snoogle Total Body Pillow by Leachco. It was absolutely perfect for me. It cradled my belly, supported my back and head and ensured I woke up well rested all the way through the end.

Night sleep isn't all that matters either. It is vital that you are physically resting your body during the day too. I had the luxury of having a job that not only kept me active enough but also allowed me to rest. Oh, rest time, one of the true joys of working daycare. Every day from 12-3 the babes went to sleep and I was lucky enough to have a boss and assistant who understood how important it was for me to rest so I took a cat-nap while the kiddies slept and they kept watch. The parents all knew, several of them walked in on me snuggling my niece or another child and no one ever complained - they knew I was growing two people!

If you don't have a job where you can really take a nap, talk to your boss about how important it is to rest and see about just laying down on a couch for 15 minutes or going to your car to recharge in the middle of a busy day. Getting enough rest is just as important as eating, drinking and exercising enough, especially towards the end when just walking up a flight of stairs is enough to wipe you out!  Catch a few zzzs whenever and wherever you can and do not ever feel guilty if the most you can do is walk from the bed to the couch, especially in those later months.

Bonus Tip: Take Your Vitamins!

One more thing just for good measure: Take a good prenatal. I found that the ones prescribed by my Doctor made me nauseous and I hated taking them until I discovered the wonder of a food based vitamin called Rainbow Light Prental One Multivitamin. I swear they gave me more energy, helped keep the nausea at bay and kept me feeling good! I still take them as often as I can remember to help get the girls all their essential vitamins and nutrients while we nurse.

...

Carrying twins can sometimes feel like a never ending uphill battle where your own needs constantly take a back seat to theirs. But if you eat, drink, move and rest enough I promise you that not only will your babies be stronger and healthier, but you too will feel better and hopefully have an easier pregnancy. Well, as easy as carrying two could possibly be!

What are some of your tips for a happy healthy pregnancy?

Xo,

Maigen

On Having Just One More

Summer is here! Not really for at least another 7 weeks but here in Upstate NY we like to skip the Spring apparently and it's been in the 80s. We're so excited to get out and explore and be social again and the girls are at a great age for it. However with all this fun comes one drawback for a new mom of twins like myself - the questions, comments and interrogation you get out in public and at family gatherings. I wrote before how it usually doesn't bother me (still doesn't!) but there is one question that is killing me and I'm already so tired of talking about:

"So when are you going to have another one?"

Over. It.

I know lots of twin moms who already had kids or who want more but, sorry to say, we are not one of those families (alright, I'll add a yet). I know people's reactions are innocent. I know they probably just assumed that we want more and when I tell them our answer they're a little surprised. But it doesn't just stop there. Usually my answer is an easy going "We're not planning to." or "We're done!"  But everyone has to press it! No one just says "Oh, ok!" They say, "No way! You can't be!" And when I ask "Why can't I?" they give me a myriad of crazy reasons.

It's happened so often lately I now have my responses ready to go. Four times at a family party last weekend and once at dinner with more family. Usually I just smile and repeat, "We're good." But here's what really I want to say:

You aren't even going to try and just have one next time?

First of all, are you insinuating that I can control how many children my body produces at one time? Cause I can't. Even if I did want another one I can't "try" to make just one. Because, you know, science. My eggs like to split, sue me. Second, no, we are not planning to try and have another and most definitely not more than one, because, right now, we don't want even just one more.

You need to try for a boy! Or: CJ needs a son!

Nope, we don't. I have two kids who will already cost a bundle to feed and clothe and I'm supposed to add a growing boy on top of that just because? Really? My parents have two girls and we all did just fine. A boy will not magically make everything better for anyone, as, unfortunately, we are not royalty and do not require an heir. Also, CJ loves the girls so incredibly much that they (plus me) alone fulfill his heart more than enough - he does not need a son and the idea that he won't be complete without one is insulting to our daughters.

They need another sibling!

They do? Huh. That's weird. Because I only have one sister and I'm great! We were fine with that growing up, grateful, even, to not have to share everything with someone else. They'll be lonely? Sure, I mean, they have each other but whatever. At least they already have a cousin and maybe one more in the future. I think they'll be just fine. Not to mention they've already had to share us with each other from day one! They do not need another sibling.

But you can't be done yet! Don't you want to be pregnant again?

Hi, I'm 31 and I've already had one of the most stressful and difficult pregnancies known to womankind. Not only did I carry two babies that were identical twins, I had gestational diabetes, a c-section and they had a two week nicu stay. I bet I could easily equate my one pregnancy to many women's three or four combined in terms of exhaustion, pain, immobility and anxiety. Nope, I don't want to be pregnant again.

Don't you want another one though, babies are the best!

Babies are the best. And the best part about babies? They don't stay babies for long. Thank god. Ever try to eat or sleep at night with not just one but two screaming newborns who need to eat every 2 hours on the dot? It is nearly impossible. And we are no where near out of this yet - they're still babies for god sakes! Sure, one newborn would probably be a breeze for us but you expect me to want to do all that all over again and with two older kids too? Are you serious? Why the hell would I want to do a thing like that!? And, dear lord, what if I have two more? Then what?!

Like I said - over. it.

The worst is when these questions come from people who have only one or two children themselves. Come on! Maybe you regret that you didn't have more for whatever reason but it's not so crazy that I don't think I will!

And what about the simple fact that I only ever wanted two kids? Lots of people only want two but they aren't given a hard time over their choice. So I happened to complete my family in one fell swoop but you think I have to have at least one more just because? What the hell?

We're good. I repeat, right now, while my children are only 9 months old and still babies, that for all of the above reasons, none of which will change in the near future, I can confidently say that we do not want another baby. We. Are. Good. 

So please stop giving me a hard time when I tell you that.

I will continue to be polite and bite my tongue but if you encounter me (or any mom) at a gathering this summer and have read this, I'm begging you to please keep it in mind. Aside from being annoying, no one likes to have those awkward exchanges where the answer is not what the person expected. Things get weird. It's not really your business to know why and you should always be mindful of the battle other people may be facing including infertility, financial burdens, a loss, family issues etc. All of these things can impact their family size and you have no idea what your question is bringing up for them. They likely don't want to or feel the need to get into it, just as I hate having to explain why, so it could get uncomfortable for everyone. So just don't ask!

That is all.



I really, really hope I'm not jinxing the hell out of myself.

Xo,
Maigen

10 Ways To Get Things Done With {Twin} Infants

One of the biggest concerns I had when we found out about the twins was how I was ever going to get anything done around the house with two babies. Or shower on no nap days. Or even just use the bathroom any day!

Children grow, learn and develop best with lots and lots of free play time on the floor. We know now that overuse of propping or other baby receptacles has potential to inhibit their natural development. While some days every mom loves and is able to just hold or play with baby for hours on end, eventually there is laundry to be done or dinner to be cooked and those things rarely coincide with nap time.

Also when you have twins or more than one child there are days that everyone's out of sync and there is no "nap time" to get things done as one will be up while the other sleeps. Those days are LONG.

Knowing this struggle here's my list of my favorite resources for any budget that can help you figure out how to get things done (in and out of the house) while still being a present parent to your twins!

Baby wearing 

I can't believe I don't have a pic of me wearing both

While it doesn't seem like a very easy or practical feat for a twin mom at first, baby wearing twins is absolutely possible and sometimes necessary. Using a wrap like the Boba or Moby you can tandem wear your twins until they're about 10 lbs. each. After that you can wear a woven wrap with a front/back or hip carry or two separate carriers for back and front carry. Youtube is a great resource for how-to videos, as is the facebook group Tandem Baby Wearing. This is ideal for babies who have a hard time settling and you still need to get things done. Getting your hands on a great twin wearing system can be an investment but you can find what you want online.

Bouncy chairs 

 

Perfect for newborns to sleep or lay in and also appropriate for some contained playtime. The vibrate feature can knock out even the fussiest baby and the elevation means they can see you without having to strain to do so. You can bring them in the bathroom while you shower, in the bedroom while you fold and put away clothes or just leave them in the living room to get the dishes done.  The only con we found is that they take up a bit of space. We stopped using ours around 4 months too so I would highly suggest buying used considering the little time these are used.

The Laundry Basket Trick 

 

 A fellow twin mom friend let me know about this and I will be forever grateful for it. Take a rectangular laundry basket and line it with blankets. Place a baby at each end and put toys in their laps and throughout the basket and you have an easily transportable playpen. It goes in the kitchen with me while I cook, on the back porch for some safe outside time, in the bathroom so I can shower and in the living room when they're not feeling the playmat or anything else. Too cold outside? Pop them in front of a window for a change of scenery. They can see everything and they love it! This is the most budget friendly option as what family doesn't have a laundry basket?

The Snoogle Pillow Trick

While we're on the subject of ways to support two babies without sitting right there, my snoogle body pillow (one of my pregnancy must-haves) is a great sitting up aid for the girls! It creates a nice little nest where they can move around and explore without much restriction. If they topple over they land on the pillow and just try to roll over. We even bring it outside as extra padding. I'm also getting more than my money's worth with the snoogle.

High Chairs (bonus if they have a newborn recline position) 

We have the Fisher Price Space Savers that have a full-blown recline. We needed these as our too-small kitchen did not allow for two moving adults plus two bouncy chairs or standard size high chairs. Starting from about 2 months old on fussy days I would lay the girls in their high chairs and use links to string some toys on their laps, although they were more interested in watching me cook or clean up. They can still see you, are safe and entertained and can transition from newborn high chair all the way up to booster seat for a big kid, making them a worthy investment. Due to the nature of how messy babies can be when they eat I would definitely buy these new, but you can find them for as little as $40.

Exersaucers/Jumpers

Great for the older babies who are bored with laying all the time. They can exercise their muscles while changing up their perspective. We picked up a used exersaucer and new, budget friendly at just around $75, Fisher Price Space Saver jumper that they're not quite heavy enough to really bounce in yet at 15 lbs but they can practice standing, reach up for the toy bar and push the buttons to make music. Experts say not to rely on them too much (research shows that overuse can actually hinder muscle tone development) but once a day for a half hour or so is perfect for a little exercise and a break for momma's back! Definitely go for good used condition if you can as everyone and their brother has had one of these so they are easy to find in excellent used condition.

Galt Playnest

These were gifted to us by my Dad for Christmas this past year and at first I was afraid they wouldn't get used much. They were too small to sit in them at first and just cried when we put them in. We waited a few more months until they were able to sit up better and now they love them. They are quickly outgrowing sharing the laundry basket and since twin families never have two empty laundry baskets, the playnests are perfect. They can reach their toys without feeling too restrained and the inflatable sides allowed them learn to sit in a safe space. Yes, they take up some space but not more than the people who are inflating pools in their living rooms to contain their kids (glad we're not there yet) It solves the issue of when I want them to play independently but they don't need me to be right there to watch them in case they fall over. I can cook or clean up the house and they play happily in the position they want to be in but can't quite get to or stay in safely yet. For just $40 a piece they are well worth it.

Twin Size Pack and Play 

Originally we feared this was a waste of money. They hated the bassinet part and didn't sleep well in it. We packed it up within a few weeks and were planning on selling it until Viv started to move all over the place (no crawling yet but she can roll clear across the room in 30 seconds) and we needed a way to contain her while not inhibiting her movement too much. I know a lot of people rely on pack and plays but the twin size one is a necessity for two mobile babies. We tried fitting them both in a standard size one and they were just rolling over on top of each other. The added six inches or so on each side guarantees each baby has her own space, toys are contained and within reach and they're able to move around and practice their skills safely. You can buy new or if you're lucky you can find them used on CraigsList or Twin Resale Facebook groups.

 ...

What about when you're out and about with twins? How do you grocery shop or run to wal-mart with two infants?!

A Really Good Double Stroller

I really wish we had had one before last week. I don't do car seats on carts so runs to the store didn't ususally involve a lot of purchases until recently. After a few trips I started hating shopping with them though. Read all about our issues with our stroller and learn from our mistake - get a good one! The easiest way to ensure you will get out of the house with infant twins is having a stroller that is easy to push and navigate through congested aisles in a department or grocery store. A really good one will allow you to push and pull a grocery cart and won't make the whole trip harder. Our stroller sucked. I would wear one and put the other in the cart basket but I had no room for much food or larger items. Absolutely invest in a good stroller for the get go but I even think a double snap and go that the car seats click into would have been good until we needed a new one. I mostly just avoided big shopping trips until they were big enough to sit in the cart seat at which point we fell in love with the...

A Buggy Bench

A brilliant invention by a twin mom that has saved my sanity.Trips to the grocery store, target or anywhere with a cart are a breeze. I fit 2 weeks worth of food and paper products in the car with both the girls. The girls did great, they were so happy to be out and seeing new things and I didn't have to wait until they were in bed to go grocery shopping. The seat was easy to attach to the cart, supported Viv really well and looked adorable as you can see.

I found mine on Zulilly for about $15 off retail so keep your eye out for it.

...

 
So, new twin moms (or moms of 2+) take heart! There are many ways for every family to get things done with lively babies about, no matter what your budget or house size. Trust me, we're living with the smallest of each!

Just remember that while baby receptacles are great resources when you need a place to keep baby safe while you are otherwise occupied, baby should spend as much time as possible on the floor. Find a happy medium that includes lots of floor time and use these tips when you need a safe place to put baby while you're getting things done!

What's your favorite trick for getting things done with two itty bitties in (or out of) the house?

Xo,

Maigen

FIAO 1.5 Transporting The Twins - Time To Upgrade!

We're going to revive my little FIAO series (read here) and address something I've been dreading and kind of thought we had wrapped up months ago. When I was pregnant I spent a hefty amount of time researching how the heck I was going to actually get out of the house and have a life with twins. There were so many factors I needed to consider, not the least of which was making it easy as possible to travel with two tiny babies but also making budget friendly but quality choices that would be worth it in the long run. Talk about trying to find a needle in a haystack.  I'm back after 9 months of use and ready to review and update our choices!

Before knowing they were twins I planned on buying a really nice convertible car seat that would last forever and a decent stroller for the first few months before I got comfortable carrying and wearing him or her. Two babies meant infant bucket seats to make transporting two as easy as possible and a double stroller, ideally one that car seats connect into at least for the beginning. We opted for a side-by-side double that our infant car seats clicked into but would last until the girls were older. We also had two bases for each car. Back in 2014 the entire package cost about $500, split between seven of our amazing friends and family members who graciously gifted them to us.

Although it wasn't love at first sight thanks to a hefty learning curve with opening, closing and navigating, we were really liking our choice with the Graco FastAction Fold Duo. We still love the Graco Snug Ride Click Connect 30 car seats. The girls do not cry in the car ever and who knows if that matters but they only just got too heavy to carry all together at the same time at 15 lbs. I can still do one at a time but it's getting up there.

Best part about this stroller - seeing my girls!

The stroller was perfect when they were small and we needed to go to the doctors or Target. The car seats click in relatively easily with practice, the baskets are big enough for a diaper bag for twins, a blanket and a few other small items.  Closing it really is easy but opening it is like a balancing act and near impossible in the wind and snow or a really rainy parking lot. You will figure it out though and do it well in a few weeks.

They say it's the size of a standard wheelchair, so it should fit through doors that are handicap accessible which you think is all of them but I swear not all doors are created equal and even the ones where it should fit are tough to get through (unless it's a double sliding door, hence all the trips to target). The angle and the incline matter too. This isn't an affiliated link so I'm going to be honest, it's a pain in the ass. And, because the wheels are plastic it isn't great to push on walks, does not do well on grass and is bumpy sometimes even on smooth concrete or in a store/Target (ahem).

Our main issues started in the last month or so when it was warming up and the girls were sitting up. I am not carrying the girls to and from anywhere in the car seats since the ensemble is way too heavy. One of things I loved about the stroller was that they faced me while in the car seats, but now that they sit they can't see me at all. And I can't see them at all without stopping and leaning over. They are getting freaked out even while I talk to them, and I know it's a phase but it's making walks and shopping trips really difficult. Also, the visors are too short (maybe it's them, but still) so the sun is always in their eyes. Since they'd rather eat than wear their sunglasses or hats that's creating an issue too.

Looks cozy but that was a BUMPY walk!

We really started looking into tandem strollers when I was getting anxious over the stroller fitting through doors and not going places I wanted to, like the gym, restaurants or the library. And then there was the lovely issue of them getting their fingers caught on a door frame while I'm paying attention to lining it up just right to squeeze into a door by half an inch. It almost happened leaving the doctor's office last month and ever since we haven't gone out much. That's been fun.

Viv approves!

I thought about getting two umbrella strollers and latching them together or a twin jogger but really did not want to spend or ask family to help with a $700+ stroller. A local woman listed the Contours Optima on facebook for $225 and I asked my parents to get it for the girls for their birthday. That afternoon my dad showed up with a Contours Options Elite (which I'm pretty sure is better and it's new!) Thanks Papa T!

So does Jules!

So far it is perfect! First, it's beautiful. We got the teal color and the girls love to stare at the zig-zags in the canopy, which expands huge but even on the regular setting blocks out majority of the sun from their faces. We took it for a walk and it steers and handles beautifully. I have mastered opening and closing it and I don't feel anxiety over doing that in a parking lot in the rain. It addresses the door issue since it's the width of a single stroller and the length is great. It doesn't feel like a double stroller at all and the girls a

ren't squished! Also, there's no one sitting underneath anyone else.

Love that they can see me and each other!

Look at those canopies!

There are seven seating configurations, including a car seat adapter that works with our car seats if we need to use them again. They can face me, face out or face each other. It has rubberized wheels with absorb bumps and it fits through my front door which is crazy since my house is like 200 years old and was apparently built by very small people. It has a weight limit of 40 lbs./seat and while I can see how the seats don't have a ton of wiggle room for bigger kids I am hoping we won't be using it that often by that point. At the rate they're going they'll be 40 lb. 1st graders so they damn well better be walking. If they're not, the seats and footrests are adjustable and when it's folded up it only takes up about 3/4 of the trunk in my Hyundai Elantra.  All in all it's everything we wanted and it's awesome!

We are going to store the side-by-side in case we need it for some reason and then sell the car seats, bases and stroller together as a package since we think that's one of the really great parts of this stroller.  It has good, quality car seats that fit right in and in a way that both babies can see you all the time. One without the other doesn't make much sense. This is unless you have a Double Snap & Go, which is what we should have gotten in the first place. Twin moms who are reading this - Trust me. Everyone is right. Buy one now.  I didn't and I regret it 9 months later.  We will use the money to get the girls their new car seats, which is a whole different ball game. I don't even know where to start with that one right now! Luckily we have six inches and 15 lbs. left before we max out our cute little car seats!

I am so excited to have this great new stroller in time for nicer weather and so grateful to have such an amazing support system of family and friends who are helping us through this journey. I am humbled by the amount of love my babies receive every day from the people who mean the world to us.  We are truly blessed.

Xo,
Maigen